Pigeon English, Women’s English.

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I have always admired how women have their own version of the English language.  Firstly they use more words than men to speak an average of 30,000 for women a day and 10,000 for men on average.  Women also use questions as instructions which is another use of English that defy’s the normal rules of English, for example a man might say “You aren’t going to buy that are you?”  and he means exactly that in question form however the same question from a woman will actually mean “you aren’t going to buy that, are you!”

A woman knows the answer to all of her questions yet asks them anyway and perhaps it is this that increases her word use by 2/3 rather than anything else.  Perhaps if a woman asked fewer questions she already seems to know the answers to she would reduce her word use in a day considerably, for example “You aren’t going out with the lads tonight, are you!” compared to “You’re not going out.” would reduce each sentence by half.  The cleaver way in which a woman always knows the answer to her own questions is worthy of Master Mind.

The fact that a man’s woman will always know the answer to her questions gives him a sense of trust in her decision-making and thus the man rarely argues because he is secure in her decision-making based on the fact that she seems to know so much, after all when a man asks questions he asks them through a lack of knowledge where as a woman asks questions yet always in the full knowledge of the answer.

Thank God for the women in men’s lives or who’d know where they’d be?  Probably down the pub with their mates 😉

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One thought on “Pigeon English, Women’s English.

  1. I dated a woman who often prefaced her sentences with, “I don’t know how you feel about. . .”
    A typical example is: “I don’t know how you feel about going out to dinner tonight.”
    Am I supposed to answer that? (Was that a question?)
    A more direct approach would be: “Do you want to go out to dinner?”

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